I run every morning. I have a nice playlist that keeps me going and great back-roads that encourage me to go further every day. But this morning, I ran in silence. The world is too loud for me to simply add to the noise. Hate, violence, division, injustice, misunderstanding; it’s all too loud. I normally keep to myself with opinions about social and political issues. I do this because I don’t like to start fights; I don’t always have an opinion; and typically I don’t have a solution. But as I ran in the silence this morning, God put a prayer on my heart. It seems as if I don’t have much more to offer at the moment. So despite the pain in my gut for adding to the noise, I will follow the call to share what I can offer.
I am terrified to wake up.
Every day brings another tragedy, the next more confusing and heartbreaking than the one before.
I hurt for the families and friends of the black community being wrongfully shot and beaten by police.
I hurt for the families and friends of the police officers gunned down at a peaceful protest.
I hurt for my family and friends whose only response to this pain is passive-aggressive social media posts and light dinner conversation.
In my young, white, female, upper-middle class perspective, it is impossible for me to begin to understand.
I am not scared to be stopped by the police. I am not scared to drive my car. I am not scared to go to a convenience store. I am not scared to go to work. I am not scared to serve my community. I am not scared of being killed today.
But I am scared of sitting back to watch injustice and violence rule the world You created.
So I pray for the strength, the guidance, and the heart to make this prayer more than a prayer.
I pray that I speak up even when I do not have words, I act even when I am hesitant, and I love without exception even when I live in a world that does not.
For peace and love, safety and courage, and liberty and justice for ALL, amen.